Time Flies

Okay, I'm off of my soapbox for a moment. I'm simply going to talk about the one thing in the world that makes me smile ALL the time. The one thing in my life that seems to have no flaws. The one thing that I want to bottle up in this very moment in time and not allow to go anywhere or change in any way.

My family.

I don't mean the hundreds of unnamed or forgotten people that you just happened to be connected to in some random manner. Nor do I mean that folks that you only see at weddings, funerals, and family reunions. Nor am I talking about that not-so distant relative whose house you hate going to because you're scared to sit on the couch or eat any food that you're offered due to all of the roaches you see crawling around.

No, I'm talking about the four most important people in my life. My four ladies.

Of course I'm talking about my niece, Na'Zyia Kamarria Williams. If you know me, you know that I'm in love with this little girl. But I'm also talking about my sister, mother, and grandmother.

They mean so much to me that I have their initials, A.T.T.N., engraved on the ankh that lays on my chest, close to my heart. (Insert AWWWWs here.)

This past week, two of my ladies experienced birthdays. My niece turned four years old and my grandmother reached an amazing seventy-one years.

Their birthdays made me think, made me reflect. I tend to do that. Let's start with Na'Zyia.

The crazy thing is that I remember when my sister, Na'Zyia's mom, was just four years old. Hell, I remember when she was born, ending my wonderful reign as an only child.

The day I found out that she was pregnant was surreal. This same little girl whose hair I'd plaited and diaper I changed was now going to have a baby. I had the typical father-figure/big brother reaction. It was some sort of mixture of anger with disappointment, more disappointment. When I use to bounce her on my knee chanting "jimmee jimme jaa mama", I had so many plans for her. (That actually was initially "Joe Namath and John Matusak", but she heard differently and requested it often.) She was going to be a world-renowned doctor/lawyer/architect/singer/dancer/world-changer. Now she's busy doing her damndest just being a good citizen of the world and a great mother. Applause, applause!

It's amazing to see my niece at four. I'm searching for the PAUSE button. It seems like just last week that I was seeing her for the first time. And it seems like just yesterday that I was encouraging her to take her first steps, while she was more inclined to stay entrenched in some surfer-like position, afraid of what might come with that next step. Now, the fear is mine. I worry about what might come with that next step. Just as fast as these four years arrived, I know that equally fast will arrive the big girl bicycle days, followed by the first crush days and the...let me stop. I'm getting light headed.





I try hard to play a significant part in her life. I don't want to miss out on 'those' moments, those special moments that no picture or facebook post could ever truly capture. I don't want time to fly away on me.

But time has seem to fly away. My grandmother is a fine example. Like I said, she just turned seventy-one. Now, I don't know what your grandma's seventy-one looks like, but my grandma's looks like weekly dollar store and Walgreens shopping coupled with arthritis and religious Wheel of Fortune watching.

My grandma and I are extremely close. I am the first of her 35, 42 (I don't know, I lost count) grandchildren. In fact, I consider myself her seventh child, especially, given the fact that my uncle is only a few years older than I am. Growing up, my grandma was my rock, my friend. When Mama was working multiple jobs to make "IT" happen, I was being spoiled with Mahalia Jackson serenades and sweet potato pie spoon-licking.






When there was no one else for me to talk to, there was my writing and my grandma.

But seventy-one. Damn!

The Grandma I grew up with was never going to be seventy-one. She was always going to be that "Dang, that's your grandma? She looks my mama's age" grandma.

While she's far from incapacitated, she has slowed down a bit. I don't envision her hopping on the back of motorcycles anymore. It seems like just yesterday when she was. She's always been a hilarious, compassionate, and caring person. She taught me how to laugh at myself and others, and the importance of being "good".She has not only been in my entire life, she has been a significant factor in creating the man I am today. (Thank or blame her.)

I got really sentimental in what I wrote in her birthday card, and, of course, she cried. Again, PAUSE button, please.

But in life there is no PAUSE button. If only it was that easy. Forget the Staples EASY button, give me a DVR remote for life. So, I can pause and replay those moments that I never want to leave.

But that doesn't exist. Time DOES fly and we can do nothing to stop it. We can only maximize those moments we're given. So, I say, take a moment to press that imaginary pause button today. If you have someone(s) special in your life, take a moment to bask in the now with them. There will never be another right now.

Be like me: hug them, kiss them, pinch their cheeks. My grandma loves it! Listen to their stories that they are so passionate about but make no sense to you at all, and love it! There's going to come a time when you'll long to hear about unicorns and tea parties.

No matter your religious or spiritual beliefs, you have to agree that LIFE is a precious gift. I may not know why we're here, but I do know that we must maximize the time we're given.

My niece is my princess, and my grandma is my queen. If someone finds a way to make time stop, leave a comment on this page. I need them with me, always. (Resume the AWWWWWs.)